Keeping Your Cool On Your Wedding Day

Posted on: June 07, 2009

We probably all know somebody who has said their wedding was the easiest thing they ever planned or that their husband to be or sister or mother planned their whole wedding. In most cases however, it's the bride who winds up taking the lion's share of the responsibility in planning the big day - and there usually are pretty big emotional, financial, mental and time commitments involved. In this article, we've assembled seven tips to keep in mind so that you can keep it cool in the days up to and including your wedding day. Take a deep breath....

# 1 - Make a Decision and Stick to It

The wedding industry is huge and there are a lot of vendors vying for your attention with a lot of different products. You'll definitely be making some decisions. In order to save yourself time in the end, we suggest you get comfortable with researching. You should feel comfortable that you've looked at enough options while staying away from the temptation to look at every single one your options - especially when there are hundreds if not thousands of options out there to choose from! When you're comfortable with your preliminary research, you should make the decision and not look back. What this means is once you pick your wedding dress, for example, don't go ahead and keep looking at others - this will not do you any good. Do you research first, feel comfortable, then make the decision. This will really save you time and stress in the end!

#2 - Use Your Intuition

When dealing with wedding related conflicts, problems and decisions, take a step back from the situation. Look to your intuition for the most truthful and best answer. Sometimes when wedding planning, there are so many opinions people will offer you but at the end of the day, it's your decision and your wedding. Intuition is basically listening to your inner voice. For example, if your mom thinks you shouldn't invite children to your wedding but you think you would like to have kids at the wedding, you should look at how you really feel about what the right answer is for you, go with your gut and then stick with your decision. Remember that the person who knows what's most right for you is none other than….you!

#3 - There is Life After Wedding

You may hit a point in your wedding planning where you think "all I do is plan this wedding!" Rest assured that you are not alone and too much of a good thing can sometimes be a bad thing. When you're feeling overwhelmed by wedding stuff, our advice is to step back and see this stage in your life as part of a full and accurate perspective of your entire life - this day is one day and there is a whole lifetime to be lived after the wedding. Don't get sucked into focusing on this one day too much. Know full well there are things that won't be perfect but life will go on….We promise!

#4 - Enlist Dependable Help

It sounds like common sense but we're certain that some brides would fall into the trap of wanting to do everything by themselves or not asking the right people to help them. First of all, unless you're having a tiny wedding, you should plan on asking your friends and family for help. Whether you need help with choosing your dress, picking up flowers, setting up the reception area or organizing the guests on the wedding day, you can't do everything yourself….you should be busy having fun on your wedding day! So when choosing from your group of friends and family, keep in mind a few things: Does this person have the skills that I need? Does this person have the time available in their schedule that I will need? Does this person have the willingness to help me? Does this person have anything in their lives that may keep them from helping me? It all sounds a bit selfish - me, me, me….But you know what? This day is about you and how you can make it easier and less stressful for you. Put yourself first by asking for dependable help….

# 5 - This is a Rite of Passage

We heard somebody refer to planning and going through a wedding as a “Rite of Passage” once and this thought was strangely comforting and rang true. Everybody planning a wedding will have their own unique and memorable experience but the one common element is that it marks a passing from one phase of life to another. In that sense the term “Rite of Passage” lends a commonality to the whole process and makes us feel that we are not alone! And you aren’t. If you start feeling overwhelmed with the task ahead of you, just remember the number of women who have gone through all of this before you and those who will go through it after you. Some had more challenges to overcome and some had less but your experience is unique yet common. When you focus on the connection you have with others in this sense, you are sure to feel less overwhelmed.

#6 - You are Learning

Life is learning - plain and simple. When you learn, you're bound to make mistakes and not do everything totally perfect. It could be a relatively small mistake like buying your ring bearer pillow for $50 before seeing it on sale for $15 somewhere else. Or a larger mistake like asking someone to be your maid of honour who isn't up to the task for whatever reason. The whole point of making mistakes is that you learn and that you bring that learning with you for the rest of your life. Planning a wedding will actually require some skills and learning from you that you may not have ever done. Any type of learning is always a plus factor. So try not to take any mistakes too hard. Who knows…..maybe you could even be a great help to someone else in planning their wedding. Everything happens for a reason…

#7 - Be Kind to You

This last point can't be emphasized enough, we think. Planning a wedding can be challenging and time-consuming but also fun. Indulge in the things you like to do. Whether it's going to the movies, going dancing, hiking in the woods, baking, reading, going to the spa or eating ice cream, go ahead and do it (well, maybe not too much ice cream!). Have lots of me time and treat yourself well. Acknowledge that you deserve it for taking on the task and responsibility of planning a wedding which won't be easy at times.

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